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The Fashionable Housewife

The Fashionable Housewife

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How To Look After Yourself When Caring For Someone Else

Modified on August 5, 2021 at 6:06 PM

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When you’re caring for a loved one, whether it’s an elderly parent or a relative with a life-limiting illness, it’s important to look after yourself and your own health and wellbeing. This will help you to maintain the energy and good health that you need to be able to be an effective carer for someone else. There is support out there to help you if you’re struggling to care for someone else. 

It is important for you to keep on doing the kind of activities that you enjoy away from your duties as a carer. If you can regular breaks from caring for someone, you can avoid becoming worn out and not being able to support them anymore. Make sure you take at least a little time out to do something just for you every day. 

You should never feel guilty about taking time out for yourself. A lot of people who have to be cared for by their relatives feel more comfortable accepting help if they know that the ones caring for them are still able to some time out for their own rest and relaxation. You might not be able to cut out all the stress that comes with caring for someone else, but it will help you if you can take some steps to look after yourself. 

Your Health And Wellbeing

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If you are caring for someone else, or have someone under a conservatorship, it can be easy to put your own needs after the needs of your loved one. However, if you are feeling tired or stressed, you do need to look after yourself, so you are able to continue to care for the person that needs your help and support.

Take the time to get some exercise. Every day you should try to do something physical like a walk or stretching. Find an exercise you enjoy, like swimming, dancing, or cycling. If you can exercise, you can also maintain some more energy. 

Make sure you get enough sleep. It’s common for carers to struggle with their sleep. If you do struggle, limit your intake of coffee and alcohol, especially later on in the day. Before bedtime, try something relaxing, like a warm bath or a herbal tea. If you find that you’re still struggling to fall asleep after twenty minutes, get up, do something else, and then try again. If you have to get up in the night to help the person you’re caring for, try to get some rest during the day, like a nap. If you often have trouble sleeping, it could be worth seeing your nurse or doctor. 

Try to keep up a healthy diet. Sometimes this can be hard to do when you’re busy, especially if stress is affecting your appetite. If you’re caring for someone though, you need to keep your strength up, so try to eat a balanced diet. Of course, you can always treat yourself with something you really enjoy occasionally too. 

Find the time to do something for yourself every day. Find a few things that you enjoy that will give you a little break to refresh your energy. Make sure you keep up social contact with your friends and find time for your own activities as much as you can. 

If you’re religious, try to keep up with going to church at least once a week. Whether it’s prayer, yoga, or Eucharistic adoration, doing things for your spiritual growth can really help you with self-care for your own mental health. 

Emotional Health

Caring for someone who has a life-limiting illness can take a real toll on your own emotions.  It’s important to care for your own emotional health so you can carry on caring and keep up your own emotional strength. 

When things seem hopeless, some people find it useful to put their hope into different, small things. For example, if you’re caring for someone with a lifelong illness, you might not be able to care for a cure, but you can have hope that your loved one has a day where they feel well. 

Other family and friends can offer some support, but it can also be helpful to talk to a professional, like a counselor. someone who is not connected to you or the person you’re caring for can offer a different perspective and help you to see things clearly. 

A counselor can help in lots of different ways:

  • Suggesting ways to manage relationships
  • Giving ideas for better communication
  • Advising you on how better balance your own needs with caring

If you think you would benefit from professional help, you can start by talking to your usual doctor who can then refer you to a specialist. 

Accepting Help

Carers often don’t seek help for themselves, as they feel the needs of the person they’re caring for are more important. If your loved one is receiving palliative care, it’s also common to feel that the care team is too busy to offer you help.

Remember that you are an important part of the care team. Your wellbeing is just as important if you are going to keep providing support. Don’t be afraid to ask for help for yourself, whether your loved one is in palliative care, or you’re caring for someone recovering from addiction and going through challenging heroin addiction treatment and you need advice from their team. 

Using Respite Services

Carer support and respite services are available to you if you need to take a break from the responsibilities of caring. There are options including having a volunteer stay with your loved one so you can have a break, or sending your loved one into care for a few days so you can have a longer rest to better recuperate. 

If you are struggling with feelings of frustration, guilt, or irritation, remember it’s normal to feel like this. If you’re overwhelmed, reach out for help. 

More Options For Help For Carers

There are lots of options out there that might help you if you’re struggling, which you may not have thought of yourself. If you’re finding it hard, you could try some of these ideas, which include:

  • Take one day at a time. It’s normal to worry about the future, but try and focus on each day as it happens. 
  • Make a list of other people that might be able to help you. A list will show you just how many people you can call on. If no one can help, ask the palliative, or medical, care team about what support is available for you. 
  • Keep a diary of issues to keep track. This can serve as a reminder when giving care or health updates to doctors or other carers. 
  • Ask friends or relatives to prepare meals. People are often happy to help and will willingly do this. Services that deliver meals can also help with this. 
  • Ask a friend to stay overnight. Having some extra company is nice, and might help you sleep better. 
  • Talk to your work about possible flexible work options. 
  • Book a cleaner to take care of chores at home. Maybe a friend or relative will help with this too. 
  • If you have a few people willing to take on caring duties, make a roster so you can split up the time between you. 
  • Send out an email to friends and relatives to keep them update and send out requests for any help you need. This saves making a lot of phone calls.
  • Give yourself rewards. You’re working hard, so take a break, do something special just for you that makes you feel good. 

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Posted By The Fashionable Housewife
on August 5, 2021 at 6:06 PM
Filed Under: Parenting
Tagged With: elder care, elderly, elderly care, elderly parents, mental health, self care, self-care

About The Fashionable Housewife

Sarah-Jean Ballard is the Editor in Chief of The Fashionable Housewife blog and Founder of Fashionable Media. Married to a sexy Molecular Biologist, housewife, mom to 5, homeschooler, Certified Personal Nutritionist and entrepreneur who's mission is to help moms just like you look and feel GREAT! Other interests include dancing, yoga, positive intactivism, natural birth and breastfeeding support, babywearing, paleo & gluten-free cooking, and promoting an overall healthy lifestyle to all.

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Sarah-Jean Ballard

Hi! I’m Sarah-Jean. I’m a Christian, the wife of a handsome Molecular Biologist, and the homeschooling mother of 5 beautiful kids!

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This is what our homeschool looks like sometimes. This is what our homeschool looks like sometimes. 🥳

Can’t believe my oldest son is 13 and outside helping dad do home projects like building a new deck. 🤯 Seems like yesterday he was in his walker on this back deck and it looked a lot better 😂

Thankful that @homedepot has great prices so we could finally afford to do this home reno project! 💪🏻🎉

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I asked him if he could stay 12 for one more year but he didn’t like that idea. 😒 Was worth a shot, right? 

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This is what our homeschool looks like sometimes. This is what our homeschool looks like sometimes. 🥳

Can’t believe my oldest son is 13 and outside helping dad do home projects like building a new deck. 🤯 Seems like yesterday he was in his walker on this back deck and it looked a lot better 😂

Thankful that @homedepot has great prices so we could finally afford to do this home reno project! 💪🏻🎉

#motherhood #motherhoodunplugged #hereisourhomeschool #motherhoodthroughinstagram
My first born son turned 13 years old today. 😱 My first born son turned 13 years old today. 😱

Somebody hold me. 😭

I asked him if he could stay 12 for one more year but he didn’t like that idea. 😒 Was worth a shot, right? 

Scroll for the outtakes 😂😂😂

This kid blows me away daily and makes me so proud to be his mom. I don’t have enough words to describe how much I love this child. 😭

Drop a comment and wish this boy a happy birthday! 🎉🎂 

#homeschoollife #homeschoolfamily #momlife #momlifeunfiltered #momlifeunplugged
Being a mom is hard. Being a mom and trying to sta Being a mom is hard. Being a mom and trying to stay healthy and fit is harder. 🏋🏼‍♀️🥵

Luckily, there are holistic wellness products that can help make the motherhood journey easier!

Lost Empire Herbs stands out as a remarkable family venture led by three health-conscious brothers who share a profound dedication to a wholesome, active lifestyle. 

Their journey began with a modest kitchen table and the introduction of pine pollen, but it has since evolved into something truly remarkable, exceeding all expectations.😱

What truly sets Lost Empire Herbs apart is their extensive collective knowledge, derived from years of hands-on experience, unwavering commitment, and a willingness to explore new horizons. Driven by a genuine desire to enhance lives, they made a resolute decision to make the benefits of these exceptional herbs accessible to a wider audience. 

Their primary focus revolves around offering hormonal support, a vital consideration given the prevalence of endocrine-disrupting compounds in today's world, although their scope extends beyond this singular realm. 🌱 

I'm genuinely enthused about the prospect of trying out their products, eagerly anticipating the chance to personally experience the transformative effects of these wellness herbs. The brothers' evident passion and expertise have left me intrigued and eager to embark on a journey towards total wellness, guided by the offerings of Lost Empire Herbs.

@lostempireherbs #lostempireherbs #holistichealth #holistichealing #holisticwellness #holisticlifestyle #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodjourney #motherhoodthroughinstagram #unleashthepowerofnature #rootingforyourhealth #hormonehealth @apexdropofficial
Slow down a little and visit @storylandnh !! It s Slow down a little and visit @storylandnh !!

It seems like summer is almost over and you’re probably scrambling to get all the things done on your bucket list. But don’t forget to slow down and have some fun with your kids this summer!!

Story Land in Glen NH is a great way to make some beautiful summer memories with your family! If you live in the New England area, definitely plan a visit before summer slips through your fingers, mama! ☀️ 🏖️ 

LIKE + SHARE if you needed this reminder to slow down and have fun! 

#motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodjourney #momlifeunfiltered #motherhoodrising #motherhoodthroughinstagram
Looking for something fun to do in New Hampshire t Looking for something fun to do in New Hampshire this summer? Living Shores Aquarium in Glen NH is an indoor walk through adventure that allows your whole family to discover the wonders of the ocean year-round. 

The aquarium includes interactive tide pools, exhibits, and tons of immersive activities. See otters, touch sting rays and nibble fish, interact with tropical birds and so much more. They even have axolotls and sharks! There is so much to see. We spent over 3 hours exploring the exhibits! And of course we had to stop in the amazing gift shop before we left. Don’t miss it! 

Living Shores is a fun, interactive environment that is perfect for the whole family! If you’re going to visit the White Mountains this summer, definitely make time to stop at @livingshoresnh! 🐠 🐟 🦀 

COMMENT and tell me which part your kiddos would like the best! 👇🏻

 #familytime #motherhoodunplugged #momlifeunfiltered #whitemountains #familygoals #familyfriendly
Don’t be fooled. You don’t need the perfect br Don’t be fooled. You don’t need the perfect branch to hang a swing in your yard. All you need is a tree and Slackers Build A Branch!

I got mine from @bolderplay! 🥳

Would this product solve a common problem for you too?! Comment and let me know! 👇🏻

Motherhood is hard. Sometimes cool products make it easier! 💁🏼‍♀️

#motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodrising #momlifebelike #motherhoodthroughinstagram #motherhoodjourney
You’re so exhausted you feel like you’re gonna You’re so exhausted you feel like you’re gonna die, but then…
.
.
.
.
.
.
SURPRISE!!
.
.
You can’t fall asleep!!!!!
.
.
.
Oh the joys of motherhood! Anyone else relate?!! 😮‍💨🥱😳😳😳

#momhumor #honestmom #parentinghumor #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodjourney #motherhoodrising
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