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The Fashionable Housewife

The Fashionable Housewife

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10 Things I Wish I Knew Before Having a Baby

Modified on March 9, 2022 at 1:27 AM

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It’s true when they say having a baby is a life-changing experience. From late-night feedings to establishing a routine, having a baby makes everything different. Plus, there are the unknowns and the endless learning moments as you go along. Of course, all of the uncertainties make it all worth it because, in the end, you have a child to love.

Thankfully, you don’t have to go in this alone. Many moms share the same experiences that you may face. So, speaking from experience, here are tens things I wish I knew before having a baby. 

1. Postpartum Depression and Anxiety Is Real

You’ve most likely heard of postpartum depression (PPD). It’s common, and 1 in 7 women experience it during their first year after birth. Being a new mom can be difficult — especially in the first few weeks postpartum. You could be flooded with intense emotions and not realize that you’re experiencing PPD or postpartum anxiety.

However, being aware ahead of time will help you mitigate those negative feelings. Of course, it’s not your fault. You’re also not alone. That’s why it’s critical to seek professional help as soon as you feel like something is off. 

2. Birth and Recovery Is Not Quite What You Expect

Expect the unexpected when the time comes to have your baby. Some moms have dreamy deliveries and would do it all over again. Others, not so much. It’s crucial not to get too attached to your delivery plans and be open to whatever you have to do.

Being prepared for all birthing scenarios — and knowing that you’re not fully in control of how your baby is born will take loads of pressure off — especially if it doesn’t go according to plan. 

During recovery, witch hazel and frozen pads are your friends. You’ll be sore and might even have hemorrhoids — which are tissues of blood vessels in the lower rectum that become swollen after giving birth. Witch hazel and a high-fiber diet will ease the discomfort.

3. Breastfeeding Takes Patience and Practice

If you plan to breastfeed, be aware that it can be tough. Some moms feel guilt when their milk doesn’t fully let down. Yet, when you’re in the hospital, your baby only needs a few teaspoons of milk to feel full.

It’s also crucial to recognize and understand that supplementing doesn’t make you less of a mom. It makes you more of one because you’re on the lookout for your baby’s well-being. 

Just know that breastfeeding is great for your baby. However, it might not be best for you. So, do what’s best and consider working with a lactation consultant if you find it challenging to solve your breastfeeding problems.

4. Accept All the Help You Can Get

You might be used to doing everything on your own, but you’ll most likely need to adjust to how you normally do things. So, you’re going to need all the help you can get. No matter how many baby books you’ve read or baby gadgets you bought, things happen.

So, when you’re feeling the pressure, and someone you trust offers to watch the baby — let them. That way, you can take a nap, a hot bath or have time to get out of the house. You’ll want to do anything you can to make you feel calm and like a normal person again.

5. It’s Okay Not to Love Every Waking Minute of Having a Baby

Try not to feel guilty when you’re not in a constant state of bliss and love once you have the baby at home. Many parents go through this phase. But, guess what? It’s a lot of hard work, so that doesn’t make you a bad parent. 

After the baby comes, you’ll notice that not every minute is joyful. Just know that you aren’t alone if you feel this way. You’re still a good parent, and that’s all that matters. 

6. You’ll Find Your Normal Again

After being a new mom for a while, you’ll start to wonder if things will ever be back to normal again. Of course, your life won’t be back to the way it was before. However, you will succumb to a new normal — and there will come a day where everything feels right again. Just remember, though, that moment may not happen as quickly as you might expect.

7. Trust Your Significant Other

The hard part is that you know every detail about your baby, and trusting your spouse can feel difficult. However, it’s good to have someone else share the load. You’ll need to have a break at some point.

Although they might not help the same way you do something, it doesn’t mean that what they’re doing is wrong. Start sharing the responsibility as soon as possible, so both of you can learn together.

8. Everything Comes in Phases

Take to heart that nothing is permanent when it comes to struggles. Whether it’s clinginess, sleep difficulties or feeding troubles, remember to give it time, and things will change. Those phases can feel like they last forever, but one thing is for sure, they will soon pass.

9. Connect With Other Moms

The sooner you connect with other moms, the more quickly you’ll start to enjoy your new role. Meeting friends might be harder than you expect. However, it’s always good to join a moms’ group and relate to one another with challenging experiences.

10. Take Time for Self-Care

Try to make time for yourself. Self-care is so important, and you’ll need to be easy on yourself when times get frustrating. One thing that helps is taking a deep breath and reminding yourself that you and your baby are learning. 

Plus, if you get the opportunity, try and do one thing each day to get out of the house. Once you feel comfortable leaving with the baby, it’ll do good for both of you to get fresh air.

Becoming a New Mother

Being a new mom certainly takes time, patience and acceptance. There will be numerous ups and downs, but the important thing is enjoying that rollercoaster. Before you know it, your little one won’t be so little anymore. So, enjoy the tiny moments, let your baby’s laughter fill you with love and embrace all that may come your way.

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Posted By The Fashionable Housewife
on March 7, 2022 at 6:37 PM
Filed Under: Breastfeeding, Natural Birth, Pregnancy
Tagged With: Baby, mom life, new baby, new mom, new moms

About The Fashionable Housewife

Sarah-Jean Ballard is the Editor in Chief of The Fashionable Housewife blog and Founder of Fashionable Media. Married to a sexy Molecular Biologist, housewife, mom to 5, homeschooler, Certified Personal Nutritionist and entrepreneur who's mission is to help moms just like you look and feel GREAT! Other interests include dancing, yoga, positive intactivism, natural birth and breastfeeding support, babywearing, paleo & gluten-free cooking, and promoting an overall healthy lifestyle to all.

Disclaimer

The Fashionable Housewife is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for blogs and websites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. We also participate in various other affiliate programs, and we sometimes get a commission on purchases made through our links. There is no extra cost to you! For more info, please see our Disclosure & Privacy Policy.

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Sarah-Jean Ballard

Hi! I’m Sarah-Jean. I’m a Christian, the wife of a handsome Molecular Biologist, and the homeschooling mother of 5 beautiful kids!

I enjoy homesteading, reading, writing, cooking, baking, crafting, home decorating, Xtend Barre, and of course, fashion!

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𝕊𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕙 | Fashionable Homemaker & Mom of 5
Looking at pictures of my last birth makes me grie Looking at pictures of my last birth makes me grieve my baby in Heaven that I just lost a few weeks ago. 

Knowing all the firsts we won’t be getting. All the newborn snuggles, that new baby smell, the joy of breastfeeding, it’s all gone. Slipped through my fingers in a moment, for no reason. 

No one thinks it will ever happen to them. Nothing prepares you for the loss of your child and no one can fully understand and appreciate the intense level of grief and pain until it happens to you. And if you do not understand this kind of grief, consider yourself very, very blessed and fortunate. 

Sometimes being open to life, also means being open to loss. 💔

#miscarriage #miscarriagesupport #miscarriageawareness #lossmom
READ this post before you LIKE it. 💔💔💔 A READ this post before you LIKE it. 💔💔💔

A few weeks ago, we were planning to announce that baby #6 would be joining our crew in January 2023, but instead we've been processing the death of our beloved child... 

At our 20 week anatomy scan, when we were joyfully expecting to see what our little babe looked like, we were met the words that will haunt us forever - "We can't find a heartbeat."

Two days later, we found ourselves in a foreign environment, after 5 beautiful homebirths, naturally delivering our stillborn son in a hospital. 

Dylan Marinus Ballard was born on August 31st, (our first son's birthday) at 6:43pm and weighing only 7.5 oz. 

Tearfully and filled with grief beyond words, we had to say hello and goodbye at the same time. Our beautiful son. 

Seeing his face, holding his tiny body, and admiring his little toes that looked just like daddy's was just a glimpse into the miracle of life that God allows us to partake in. When you fully realize the sanctity of human life, it makes it even harder to say goodbye. Not being able to take my baby home with me was the most gut wrenching, heartbreaking pain imaginable. It is a pain unlike all others that only mothers who have lost a child can even begin to understand. 

The hardest part of losing a child, is living everyday afterwards. It's such a devastating loss, a loss so unimaginable, that you have no idea how you will get through each day or survive the grief that is in your heart. No matter what age a child is, a parent's heart is forever tied to that child and there's nothing that will break that tie, including the passing of time. That's the beauty of unconditional love. 

Our only consolation is knowing that our little saint is in the loving arms of Jesus now. We look forward to meeting him in Heaven someday.

📷 birth photography by Melissa Lee Photography

#griefjourney #griefandloss #miscarriage #miscarriageawareness #griefawareness #griefislove #itsokaynottobeokay #largefamily #largefamilymom #bigfamily #bigfamilylife #lossmom #pregnancyloss #momlife #pregnancylossawareness #stillbirth #stillborn #stillbornstillloved #stillbornawareness #babyloss #miscarriagemomma #bereavedparents #lossmoms
Some of my favorite fall eats here! 😋 What ar Some of my favorite fall eats here! 😋 

What are your favorite fall comfort foods???

#momlife #homemaker #octobervibes #feelslikefall
Need an easy solution for dinner but don’t want Need an easy solution for dinner but don’t want fast food? @wildgrainbox delivers bake-from-frozen breads, pastries, and fresh pasta right to your door!

Clean ingredients, real sourdough, artisanal pastries, hand cut fresh pasta, eco friendly shipping, and they support small bakeries! 👩🏼‍🍳

Every item is freezer to table in 25 minutes or less so you can enjoy homemade quality food, FAST. I whipped up a loaf of sourdough bread and delicious pasta with marinara sauce in under 30 minutes for me and my husband to enjoy a little date night at home. It was like going to a fancy Italian restaurant, but we go to eat in our pajamas!

We love that Wildgrain is passionate about delivering slow-fermented sourdough bread‘s, fresh pasta, and artisan pastries directly to your door and I love that they are local to me! 

WANT TO TRY IT?! The first 50 people to use my coupon code and link can get $30 off their first box PLUS free croissants in every box! 

Use coupon code FASHIONABLEWIFE to snag this deal QUICK! 💃🏼

LlNK in bio and in stories! 🛒

#momlife #homemaker #mywildgrain #datenightideas
Introducing Caraway’s most requested products, t Introducing Caraway’s most requested products, the NEW Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan!!! 

By popular demand, they now have miniature versions of their two best-selling À La Carte pieces, now in compact and cute sizes!! 

These are designed for cooking smaller portions and are a perfect complement to your current Caraway cookware collection. 

🥳Get 10% off the new Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan using my link in my bio! 🥳

#momlife #homemaker #homelifestyle #kitcheninspo
What better way to welcome fall than with @caraway What better way to welcome fall than with @caraway_home latest products, the Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan!!! 

By popular demand, they now have miniature versions of their two best-selling À La Carte pieces, now in compact & cute sizes. These are designed for cooking smaller portions and make the perfect complement to your current Caraway collection. 

Get 10% off the new Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan using my link! 🛒

⁣LlNK is in my bio and stories! 💃🏼 Or use code FASHIONABLEWIFE-MINI22 
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Can you imagine a more beautiful thing?! I can’t Can you imagine a more beautiful thing?! I can’t! 🤣

My son is loving our @treasuresfromjennifer calendar and keeping track of the days now. He keeps telling me how many days it is until the first day of fall rather than asking me 900 times “when is it going to be fall, mama?!” 😜

Do you have a calendar or weather board in your home for your children? 

#homeschoolmom #homeschoolroom #homeschoollife #homeschoollookslikethis
Anybody else excited about apple picking season?! Anybody else excited about apple picking season?! 🍎 

When September rolls around, you’ll find us doing fun fall-themed homeschool stuff, decorating the house for fall (yes that’s a family affair!) and going apple picking!!!

What’s your favorite thing about September?! 

#septembervibes #fallinnewengland #fallvibes #applepickingseason #fallinnh #newenglandfall #newenglandlife #newhampshirefall #appleorchards
Introducing Theology of Home III: At the Sea 🌊 Introducing Theology of Home III: At the Sea 🌊 

This is the newest release in the amazing book series by @carrie.gress and @noellemering from @tan_books !! 

A must-have for homemakers, At The Sea draws from literature, mythology, and scripture to show readers the rich connections between the sea and mystery, recreation, yearning, and joyful reunions.

Within these pages you’ll find inspiration for home, womanhood, and family. Learn more about water in Scripture, Our Lady as Stella Maris, and more. This book is beautifully laid out and includes breathtaking photography that will capture your heart. 

It would make a beautiful gift or a lovely addition to your book collection. 

Use the TAN Books link in my bio to shop and use ✨coupon code RAISINGWILD-15 for 15% off!✨

#fashionablewife #fashionablehome #homemaker #homemakerlife #homedesignideas #homedecorations #theologyofhome #homeishere #domesticchurch #tradcat #bookstagram #bookshelf

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Looking at pictures of my last birth makes me grie Looking at pictures of my last birth makes me grieve my baby in Heaven that I just lost a few weeks ago. 

Knowing all the firsts we won’t be getting. All the newborn snuggles, that new baby smell, the joy of breastfeeding, it’s all gone. Slipped through my fingers in a moment, for no reason. 

No one thinks it will ever happen to them. Nothing prepares you for the loss of your child and no one can fully understand and appreciate the intense level of grief and pain until it happens to you. And if you do not understand this kind of grief, consider yourself very, very blessed and fortunate. 

Sometimes being open to life, also means being open to loss. 💔

#miscarriage #miscarriagesupport #miscarriageawareness #lossmom
READ this post before you LIKE it. 💔💔💔 A READ this post before you LIKE it. 💔💔💔

A few weeks ago, we were planning to announce that baby #6 would be joining our crew in January 2023, but instead we've been processing the death of our beloved child... 

At our 20 week anatomy scan, when we were joyfully expecting to see what our little babe looked like, we were met the words that will haunt us forever - "We can't find a heartbeat."

Two days later, we found ourselves in a foreign environment, after 5 beautiful homebirths, naturally delivering our stillborn son in a hospital. 

Dylan Marinus Ballard was born on August 31st, (our first son's birthday) at 6:43pm and weighing only 7.5 oz. 

Tearfully and filled with grief beyond words, we had to say hello and goodbye at the same time. Our beautiful son. 

Seeing his face, holding his tiny body, and admiring his little toes that looked just like daddy's was just a glimpse into the miracle of life that God allows us to partake in. When you fully realize the sanctity of human life, it makes it even harder to say goodbye. Not being able to take my baby home with me was the most gut wrenching, heartbreaking pain imaginable. It is a pain unlike all others that only mothers who have lost a child can even begin to understand. 

The hardest part of losing a child, is living everyday afterwards. It's such a devastating loss, a loss so unimaginable, that you have no idea how you will get through each day or survive the grief that is in your heart. No matter what age a child is, a parent's heart is forever tied to that child and there's nothing that will break that tie, including the passing of time. That's the beauty of unconditional love. 

Our only consolation is knowing that our little saint is in the loving arms of Jesus now. We look forward to meeting him in Heaven someday.

📷 birth photography by Melissa Lee Photography

#griefjourney #griefandloss #miscarriage #miscarriageawareness #griefawareness #griefislove #itsokaynottobeokay #largefamily #largefamilymom #bigfamily #bigfamilylife #lossmom #pregnancyloss #momlife #pregnancylossawareness #stillbirth #stillborn #stillbornstillloved #stillbornawareness #babyloss #miscarriagemomma #bereavedparents #lossmoms
Some of my favorite fall eats here! 😋 What ar Some of my favorite fall eats here! 😋 

What are your favorite fall comfort foods???

#momlife #homemaker #octobervibes #feelslikefall
Need an easy solution for dinner but don’t want Need an easy solution for dinner but don’t want fast food? @wildgrainbox delivers bake-from-frozen breads, pastries, and fresh pasta right to your door!

Clean ingredients, real sourdough, artisanal pastries, hand cut fresh pasta, eco friendly shipping, and they support small bakeries! 👩🏼‍🍳

Every item is freezer to table in 25 minutes or less so you can enjoy homemade quality food, FAST. I whipped up a loaf of sourdough bread and delicious pasta with marinara sauce in under 30 minutes for me and my husband to enjoy a little date night at home. It was like going to a fancy Italian restaurant, but we go to eat in our pajamas!

We love that Wildgrain is passionate about delivering slow-fermented sourdough bread‘s, fresh pasta, and artisan pastries directly to your door and I love that they are local to me! 

WANT TO TRY IT?! The first 50 people to use my coupon code and link can get $30 off their first box PLUS free croissants in every box! 

Use coupon code FASHIONABLEWIFE to snag this deal QUICK! 💃🏼

LlNK in bio and in stories! 🛒

#momlife #homemaker #mywildgrain #datenightideas
Introducing Caraway’s most requested products, t Introducing Caraway’s most requested products, the NEW Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan!!! 

By popular demand, they now have miniature versions of their two best-selling À La Carte pieces, now in compact and cute sizes!! 

These are designed for cooking smaller portions and are a perfect complement to your current Caraway cookware collection. 

🥳Get 10% off the new Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan using my link in my bio! 🥳

#momlife #homemaker #homelifestyle #kitcheninspo
What better way to welcome fall than with @caraway What better way to welcome fall than with @caraway_home latest products, the Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan!!! 

By popular demand, they now have miniature versions of their two best-selling À La Carte pieces, now in compact & cute sizes. These are designed for cooking smaller portions and make the perfect complement to your current Caraway collection. 

Get 10% off the new Mini Fry Pan & Mini Sauce Pan using my link! 🛒

⁣LlNK is in my bio and stories! 💃🏼 Or use code FASHIONABLEWIFE-MINI22 
.⁣
.⁣
.⁣
.⁣
.⁣
#cottageliving #decor #decoration #farmhouselove #hgtv #homedesign #interior #interiordecor #interiorstyling #kitchendesign #kitchendiner #kitcheninspo #kitchenremodel #kitchenrenovation #kitchensofinstagram #magnoliahome #modernfarmhouse #modernfarmhousestyle #neutralabodes #neutraldecor #neutralhome #neutralkitchen #neutralstyle #neutraltones #newbuild #newbuildhome #newbuildjourney #quartzworktops #shakerkitchen #whitekitchen
Can you imagine a more beautiful thing?! I can’t Can you imagine a more beautiful thing?! I can’t! 🤣

My son is loving our @treasuresfromjennifer calendar and keeping track of the days now. He keeps telling me how many days it is until the first day of fall rather than asking me 900 times “when is it going to be fall, mama?!” 😜

Do you have a calendar or weather board in your home for your children? 

#homeschoolmom #homeschoolroom #homeschoollife #homeschoollookslikethis
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