Relationships take work and it’s not always easy to keep your marriage happy. Even soulmates will find that things can get difficult once the honeymoon phase is over. Marriages don’t last simply because someone found the right person, they last because someone worked to keep the flame alive. We look at some secrets of a happy married life and things that keep it fueled for decades.
1. Nurture Your Love And Stay Invested
Nurture your positive emotions for your significant other. It’s very easy to take your partner for granted, but that shouldn’t be the way things are. Remember things that made you fall in love and cherish your time together as a couple. Appreciate and encourage even the minor things you do for each other, and be thankful for them. This is very important in order to keep your marriage happy.
Staying in love and invested is all also increasing positivity in the way you see each other. As a quote by Elie Wiesel goes, “The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.” So rather than dividing life into his things or her things, stay invested in each other’s lives and daily happenings.
2. Don’t Let The Intimacy Get Away
Spending time together and being intimate is extremely important for a satisfying, happy marriage. As many couples have found, it is surprisingly easy to end up in a marriage that lacks physical intimacy. In the busy schedules, distractions like mobile phones, and the needs of children, intimacy can end up on the backburner.
That’s a bad idea and could lead to a lower sense of well-being. Make it a point to have sex at least once a week and don’t shy away from using vibrators to maximize your pleasure. Studies have found that a good sexual frequency enhances your sense of well-being.
3. Embrace Your Ups And Downs
When you’re in it for the long haul, you’ll see times where you’re so deeply in love as when you first met. You’ll also have times when you can barely stand the sight of each other. I may have exaggerated a bit, but the fact of the matter is, relationships that last will have their ups and downs. Things cannot always be rosy and there will be times when your relationship goes through a rough face.
The thing to do in these situations is to soldier up and get to work on a better tomorrow. It helps to remember that you’re committed and determined to make it work. The little annoyances that come with spending your life with someone don’t even come close to the big joy and pleasures that come with sharing your life with that special someone.
4. Adapt And Conquer
People change with time and when you’ve been together for years, you will notice that your spouse has changed as well. Circumstances change as well, as do the times. Be adaptable, flexible, and prepared to embrace the change in your spouse. Sometimes, you may catch yourself thinking that your spouse is not the same person you met all those years ago. Well, neither are you!
Being flexible enough to accept the changes in your relationship and your spouse goes a long way to keep your marriage happy. And remember, you are a part of those changes. In your own way, you have influenced your significant other to become the person they are now. In turn, you have been shaped the same way as well.
5. Have Exciting And Pleasant Times Together
Don’t be a slave to routine. The longer you’ve been married, the more you should do to rekindle those good old times when you first started. Having a fixed calendar for dates is nice and you should stick to it. However, don’t back away from being spontaneous and planning your adventures together.
When you can, break free of the calendar and do something spontaneous. Even try something that goes beyond your usual fare to make things more exciting. Trying something new with your spouse means you get to have more shared experiences together. Discovering something new together can be an excellent moment to reinforce your bond and get closer to each other. It has been observed that couples who take exciting dates to find something new have more satisfaction than those who stick to conventional pleasant dates.
It’s worth pointing out that doing something exciting together doesn’t necessarily mean going for adventure sports. You don’t have to go skydiving or bungee jumping, simply doing things that aren’t your usual activity can be a good start.
6. Communicate With Your Partner
No one’s overselling it when they say communication is the bedrock of your relationship and the most important thing to keep your marriage happy. Occasional glossing over with it’s fine and you don’t need to worry about it is okay. However, make sure these aren’t your default answers. Your spouse has to know if you found something unpleasant or upsetting. It’s also okay to talk about the monotonous daily grind. Everything within reason should be open to conversation in marriage.
At the same time, it is necessary to be a good listener. Lend your ears to your partner without judgment or reservation. It’s not necessary that you agree, but your partner must know that they can talk with you without a worry.
Additionally, make your decisions together. You don’t have to agree on everything, you just have to agree on what works best for the both of you. Decision-making in a marriage is not a zero-sum game about power or control. Be open to compromise, but don’t be shy in putting your needs forward either.
7. Don’t Lose Your Own Self
Your individuality and your personal growth does not have to stop in a marriage. Keep a focus on your personal growth and achievements as well. Being satisfied with your life and personal and professional choices will play a role in making you feel fulfilled and satisfied. That, in turn, puts less pressure on your marriage and your partner. Being a better you who has their sense of self and purpose will make you a part of a successful marriage.
Hopefully, these tips will help you keep your marriage happy and healthy! Leave a comment and let us know if we missed anything!