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7 Secrets To Keep Your Marriage Happy

Modified on November 5, 2019 at 12:30 PM

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7 Secrets To Keep Your Marriage Happy

Relationships take work and it’s not always easy to keep your marriage happy. Even soulmates will find that things can get difficult once the honeymoon phase is over. Marriages don’t last simply because someone found the right person, they last because someone worked to keep the flame alive. We look at some secrets of a happy married life and things that keep it fueled for decades.

1. Nurture Your Love And Stay Invested

Nurture your positive emotions for your significant other. It’s very easy to take your partner for granted, but that shouldn’t be the way things are. Remember things that made you fall in love and cherish your time together as a couple. Appreciate and encourage even the minor things you do for each other, and be thankful for them. This is very important in order to keep your marriage happy.

Staying in love and invested is all also increasing positivity in the way you see each other. As a quote by Elie Wiesel goes, “The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.” So rather than dividing life into his things or her things, stay invested in each other’s lives and daily happenings.

2. Don’t Let The Intimacy Get Away

Spending time together and being intimate is extremely important for a satisfying, happy marriage. As many couples have found, it is surprisingly easy to end up in a marriage that lacks physical intimacy. In the busy schedules, distractions like mobile phones, and the needs of children, intimacy can end up on the backburner. 

That’s a bad idea and could lead to a lower sense of well-being. Make it a point to have sex at least once a week and don’t shy away from using vibrators to maximize your pleasure. Studies have found that a good sexual frequency enhances your sense of well-being.

3. Embrace Your Ups And Downs

When you’re in it for the long haul, you’ll see times where you’re so deeply in love as when you first met. You’ll also have times when you can barely stand the sight of each other. I may have exaggerated a bit, but the fact of the matter is, relationships that last will have their ups and downs. Things cannot always be rosy and there will be times when your relationship goes through a rough face.

The thing to do in these situations is to soldier up and get to work on a better tomorrow. It helps to remember that you’re committed and determined to make it work. The little annoyances that come with spending your life with someone don’t even come close to the big joy and pleasures that come with sharing your life with that special someone.

4. Adapt And Conquer

People change with time and when you’ve been together for years, you will notice that your spouse has changed as well. Circumstances change as well, as do the times. Be adaptable, flexible, and prepared to embrace the change in your spouse. Sometimes, you may catch yourself thinking that your spouse is not the same person you met all those years ago. Well, neither are you!

Being flexible enough to accept the changes in your relationship and your spouse goes a long way to keep your marriage happy. And remember, you are a part of those changes. In your own way, you have influenced your significant other to become the person they are now. In turn, you have been shaped the same way as well. 

5. Have Exciting And Pleasant Times Together

Don’t be a slave to routine. The longer you’ve been married, the more you should do to rekindle those good old times when you first started. Having a fixed calendar for dates is nice and you should stick to it. However, don’t back away from being spontaneous and planning your adventures together.

When you can, break free of the calendar and do something spontaneous. Even try something that goes beyond your usual fare to make things more exciting. Trying something new with your spouse means you get to have more shared experiences together. Discovering something new together can be an excellent moment to reinforce your bond and get closer to each other. It has been observed that couples who take exciting dates to find something new have more satisfaction than those who stick to conventional pleasant dates. 

It’s worth pointing out that doing something exciting together doesn’t necessarily mean going for adventure sports. You don’t have to go skydiving or bungee jumping, simply doing things that aren’t your usual activity can be a good start.

6. Communicate With Your Partner

No one’s overselling it when they say communication is the bedrock of your relationship and the most important thing to keep your marriage happy. Occasional glossing over with it’s fine and you don’t need to worry about it is okay. However, make sure these aren’t your default answers. Your spouse has to know if you found something unpleasant or upsetting. It’s also okay to talk about the monotonous daily grind. Everything within reason should be open to conversation in marriage.

At the same time, it is necessary to be a good listener. Lend your ears to your partner without judgment or reservation. It’s not necessary that you agree, but your partner must know that they can talk with you without a worry.

Additionally, make your decisions together. You don’t have to agree on everything, you just have to agree on what works best for the both of you. Decision-making in a marriage is not a zero-sum game about power or control. Be open to compromise, but don’t be shy in putting your needs forward either.

7. Don’t Lose Your Own Self

Your individuality and your personal growth does not have to stop in a marriage. Keep a focus on your personal growth and achievements as well. Being satisfied with your life and personal and professional choices will play a role in making you feel fulfilled and satisfied. That, in turn, puts less pressure on your marriage and your partner. Being a better you who has their sense of self and purpose will make you a part of a successful marriage.

Hopefully, these tips will help you keep your marriage happy and healthy! Leave a comment and let us know if we missed anything!

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Posted By Guest Blogger
on November 5, 2019 at 7:28 AM
Filed Under: Relationships & Marriage
Tagged With: Marriage, marriage advice, married couple, relationship, relationship advice, relationship advice for women, relationships

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Sarah-Jean Ballard

Hi! I’m Sarah-Jean. I’m a Christian, the wife of a handsome Molecular Biologist, and the homeschooling mother of 5 beautiful kids!

I enjoy homesteading, reading, writing, cooking, baking, crafting, home decorating, Xtend Barre, and of course, fashion!

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𝕊𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕙 | Fashionable Homemaker & Large Family Life
You do not find a happy life. You make it. 

That’s the biggest lesson that grief has taught me. If I just wait around to be happy again, I’ll die sad. 

You don’t get through grief and come out the other side. That’s not how it works. You learn how to grow around it like a tree grows around a rock that’s in the way. You don’t wait for the rock to move. Cause it’s not gonna. 

Choose happy. And then make it happen. 

#choosehappy #joyinthejourney #griefjourney #healingfromtrauma
8 billion smiles in the world, but his is my favor 8 billion smiles in the world, but his is my favorite. 

Happy Valentine’s Day, @daeinexplains 🥰

The last 20 years with you have been my favorite years on this earth. ❤️ 

If I did anything right in my life, it was when I decided to give my heart to you.  You are my best friend, my soul mate, my better half, my rock, my everything. 

I love you.

#couplegoals #marriedlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #weddingday #marriagegoals #yourestilltheone
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This little guy always asks to help when he sees me cleaning the house, washing the floors, doing laundry, or emptying the dishwasher. That’s what I love about Montessori parenting - it allows kids to do  big jobs and in turn makes them eager to help! 

He was over the moon when we gave him the @lovevery floor mop that actually works! He uses it daily now. The mopping pad is machine washable and you can refill the fluid container on it. I usually just do water and a drop of essential oils because he loves it when everything smells clean! 😜 

Definitely recommend! If you want to grab this mop for your little helper, it’s in the Storyteller Play Kit from Lovevery for 3 year olds. 

LlNK is in my bio to get FREE shipping! 💃🏼

#lovevery #loveverytoddler #loveverypartner #montessoriathome #montessoriplayroom #montessoritoddler
Stop trying to fit your square self in a round hol Stop trying to fit your square self in a round hole. 

Sometimes we outgrown relationships. Sometimes we realize someone else isn’t a good influence on our lives. Sometimes we realize we aren’t a good influence for someone else. Sometimes we need to let things go that aren’t good for us in order to grow. And that’s ok. 

Stop trying to sit at a table you are no longer welcome at. Just be yourself, focus on God, love your family and friends, and the right people will gravitate to you. ✌🏻 

#raisingsaints #momlife #motherhoodunplugged #selflovejourney #growingpains #selfcaresunday
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No fancy electronics, screens, or extra features we don’t need. Just simple, straight forward functions and perfect results everytime. Plus it matches all my @cafeappliances too! 😂👍🏻

What do you think of this 4 slice toaster?! 

#toasters #kitchenappliances #kitchendesign #kitchendecor #whitekitchen #farmhousekitchen #farmhousestyle #whiteappliances
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The “Steffi” in green are the perfect boots for ushering in spring weather with their delicious vintage leather and worn-in look right out of the box. I love the chunky lug soles and inside zippers to get them on and off easily. 

These are the boots you’ll want to wear again and again. And again. 

Use my coupon code BALLARD20 to get 20% off your order! Find them on www.enjoiya.com

#leatherbooties #enjoiya #italianshoes #realmomstyle #momstyle #momstyletips
All the poop shoveling doesn’t seem so bad with All the poop shoveling doesn’t seem so bad with the prices of eggs right now! 🤪 🐔 🥚 

Guess it’s ok to be a crazy chicken lady and have a homestead now! 🤣

#momlife #crazychickenlady #homesteadlife
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Want to learn more about why I’m obsessed with these pots and pans? Visit my blog and search CARAWAY! Or scroll through my feed! 🥳

#homemaker #housewifelife #homestyler #momlife
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Considering he was my 6th child, it's possible he would have been here by now. It’s been extra hard for me this week. 

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My heart is completely shattered from having an empty womb and an empty nursery. An empty bassinet in the corner and unused tiny newborn outfits, all washed, folded, and ready… for nothing. 

It makes me physically sick to my stomach when I think about it all and I can't even fathom how I got here. How did I get here? 

This isn't how it's supposed to be! I should be holding a newborn right now! It’s so unfair. 

In an instant, my baby was gone and there was nothing I could do to change that. 

It doesn't matter how much time passes or what else happens in life, I will always miss him. My heart with always long for my baby. 

Those who haven't experienced loss tell you that "Don’t worry! Things will get better, just focus on the positive!" but people who actually know this grief and what it actually feels like to lose a baby, won’t tell you that. They know this hard road. They understand that unfortunately you don't just “get over it.” 

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It is relentless.
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And it completely shatters you when you don’t expect it. 

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It’s been 137 days I’ve had to live without my baby. 

Lord Jesus, please… hold me extra tight tonight. 

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You do not find a happy life. You make it. 

That’s the biggest lesson that grief has taught me. If I just wait around to be happy again, I’ll die sad. 

You don’t get through grief and come out the other side. That’s not how it works. You learn how to grow around it like a tree grows around a rock that’s in the way. You don’t wait for the rock to move. Cause it’s not gonna. 

Choose happy. And then make it happen. 

#choosehappy #joyinthejourney #griefjourney #healingfromtrauma
8 billion smiles in the world, but his is my favor 8 billion smiles in the world, but his is my favorite. 

Happy Valentine’s Day, @daeinexplains 🥰

The last 20 years with you have been my favorite years on this earth. ❤️ 

If I did anything right in my life, it was when I decided to give my heart to you.  You are my best friend, my soul mate, my better half, my rock, my everything. 

I love you.

#couplegoals #marriedlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #weddingday #marriagegoals #yourestilltheone
Kids love helping if you just let them!💁🏼‍ Kids love helping if you just let them!💁🏼‍♀️

This little guy always asks to help when he sees me cleaning the house, washing the floors, doing laundry, or emptying the dishwasher. That’s what I love about Montessori parenting - it allows kids to do  big jobs and in turn makes them eager to help! 

He was over the moon when we gave him the @lovevery floor mop that actually works! He uses it daily now. The mopping pad is machine washable and you can refill the fluid container on it. I usually just do water and a drop of essential oils because he loves it when everything smells clean! 😜 

Definitely recommend! If you want to grab this mop for your little helper, it’s in the Storyteller Play Kit from Lovevery for 3 year olds. 

LlNK is in my bio to get FREE shipping! 💃🏼

#lovevery #loveverytoddler #loveverypartner #montessoriathome #montessoriplayroom #montessoritoddler
Stop trying to fit your square self in a round hol Stop trying to fit your square self in a round hole. 

Sometimes we outgrown relationships. Sometimes we realize someone else isn’t a good influence on our lives. Sometimes we realize we aren’t a good influence for someone else. Sometimes we need to let things go that aren’t good for us in order to grow. And that’s ok. 

Stop trying to sit at a table you are no longer welcome at. Just be yourself, focus on God, love your family and friends, and the right people will gravitate to you. ✌🏻 

#raisingsaints #momlife #motherhoodunplugged #selflovejourney #growingpains #selfcaresunday
When your toaster breaks from a power surge you ta When your toaster breaks from a power surge you take that as a sign that it’s time to upgrade! 🤪

It wasn’t hard to pick a new 4 slice toaster. As soon as I saw this one from @haden_usa I added it to my cart. I bought it from @lordandtaylor because it had the fastest shipping and I didn’t want to wait! 

No fancy electronics, screens, or extra features we don’t need. Just simple, straight forward functions and perfect results everytime. Plus it matches all my @cafeappliances too! 😂👍🏻

What do you think of this 4 slice toaster?! 

#toasters #kitchenappliances #kitchendesign #kitchendecor #whitekitchen #farmhousekitchen #farmhousestyle #whiteappliances
I’m obsessed with these leather booties from @en I’m obsessed with these leather booties from @enjoiya! 💃🏼 

The “Steffi” in green are the perfect boots for ushering in spring weather with their delicious vintage leather and worn-in look right out of the box. I love the chunky lug soles and inside zippers to get them on and off easily. 

These are the boots you’ll want to wear again and again. And again. 

Use my coupon code BALLARD20 to get 20% off your order! Find them on www.enjoiya.com

#leatherbooties #enjoiya #italianshoes #realmomstyle #momstyle #momstyletips
All the poop shoveling doesn’t seem so bad with All the poop shoveling doesn’t seem so bad with the prices of eggs right now! 🤪 🐔 🥚 

Guess it’s ok to be a crazy chicken lady and have a homestead now! 🤣

#momlife #crazychickenlady #homesteadlife
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