When you’re a busy housewife with a family to look after, it’s all too easy to continually put them and your daily responsibilities first, leaving little time for yourself. The demands of home and children can take up pretty much your whole day, and by the evening you’ll feel too tired to do much more than flop on the couch or go to bed with a book.
There are, of course, many rewarding aspects of being a busy housewife and mom, and your busy life may well provide you with plenty of happiness and satisfaction. However, being mindful of your own wellbeing and what you need to do for yourself is essential if you want to continue to manage your schedule without getting overtired or even burnt out.
Why should you value yourself?
Valuing yourself is entirely different from being selfish. The former is an important aspect of self-esteem and living a fulfilling life, whereas the latter is all about putting your own desires first. Unfortunately, when many women think about valuing themselves, it gives them a twinge of guilt, because they feel it’s just a polite form of selfishness.
If you find yourself thinking these thoughts, do your best to banish them. You can value yourself and still be selfless and generous, so don’t get valuing yourself and being selfish confused in your mind. Remember, if you don’t value yourself, those around you, including your children, will find it harder to value you; and, of course, if you want your kids to lead happy, fulfilled lives and be confident, caring adults, you need to set them a good example.
Why should you treat yourself?
If you value yourself, you’ll know how to give yourself treats amidst all your hard work. A treat could be anything that pleases you, such as some time off to pursue your own interests, meeting up with friends, going shopping, buying yourself a present, or taking a trip away.
The danger with treats is that they become less of a special way of rewarding and valuing yourself, and more of an emotional support mechanism. Comfort eating or overdoing the wine in the evenings
Learning to value yourself
If you have trouble believing you’re worthy of all the good things you wish for your family and friends, try sitting down with a pen and paper, or your tablet if you prefer, and making a list of all the positive aspects of your life. What do you achieve each day as a busy housewife? What have you done in your life that you can be proud of? These don’t have to be earth-shattering events; if you’ve got a chronic health condition, then getting out of bed each morning can be a major accomplishment. Try and think of as many things as you can both large and small, and jot them down.
If when you’re trying to make your list, you find it very difficult to think of anything positive to say about yourself, it could indicate a health issue that you should see your doctor about. Depression is an illness that can creep up on you without you realizing at first, but having problems with positive thinking and self-esteem could be symptoms of a depressive condition.
Once you’ve got your list completed, you’ll probably find you’re surprised at how much you do and what you’ve achieved. Imagine you were reading the list as if it belonged to someone else. Wouldn’t you be impressed with what this person has done? Don’t they deserve a pat on the back and a word of congratulation? Yes, they do – and that person is you!
Choosing ways to treat yourself is very much a matter of personal preference. Your idea of heaven might be spending time quietly doing a jigsaw puzzle and listening to music. Or it could be having a night on the town with a group of girlfriends. Whatever makes you happy and gives you a break from being a busy housewife is a good way to treat yourself.
You should also be comfortable with buying yourself gifts now and then. It’s always nice to receive gifts at Christmas and on your birthday, or be surprised by your partner with a thoughtful gift. You don’t have to leave it to other people though; buying yourself something you’ve always wanted, or an item that’s in a price range you’d normally avoid is a good way of saying to yourself you deserve to have some of the finer things in life. However, be sure you can comfortably afford such treats. This should not become an everyday occurrence or damage your family’s finances.
One perfect example is jewelry. Have you ever thought how nice it would be to own a piece of high-quality, expensive jewelry, especially one you’d chosen yourself? Why not treat yourself to a special necklace or bracelet that reminds you of your own value whenever you wear it? There are so many designs and price ranges there’ll be a choice to suit all tastes and budgets, but remember this is a treat, so get yourself an item that is at least a little out of your normal price range. Have a browse through some of the beautiful selections online, like Roma’s exclusive jewelry collections, or take yourself out and look round the jewelry stores.
That’s not to say that you should abandon your responsibilities as a busy housewife and blow your savings on an Internet shopping spree. That’s a sure way to make yourself miserable and feel guilty. Buying yourself a special treat loses its effect if you’re always spending money on yourself, but if it’s just now and then, each item will be a possession you treasure way into the future.
If you value yourself and know how to give yourself treats, you’ll be far happier in your life, and be better able to fulfill all your responsibilities as a busy housewife with a smile on your face and joy in your heart. A treat every now and then can give you to boost you so desperately need. Remember to value yourself, and never forget your needs.