4 Signs Your Marriage Needs Work

Nobody goes into a marriage thinking about the day it might end. Despite your expectations of a life spent together, the fact is that divorce is all too common. Despite the best intentions and hopes, not all marriages last a lifetime, and that means being aware of the signs that your relationship is not going to work out for the future.

The earlier that you recognize the signs of a failing marriage, the easier and faster it will be to resolve issues before it’s late. If you recognize any of these signs, then it might be time to start thinking about marriage counseling.

Negativity Overload

The interactions that you have with your spouse are a good barometer of where your relationship stands. If those interactions are constantly negative, disrespectful, or even spiteful, then this is a sign that there are existing issues. A lack of positivity and respect in your interactions results in arguments and resentment, and that means you could be closer to a meltdown than you think.

Cheating

While each individual has their own limit when it comes to cheating, if it becomes a consistent issue then it’s a big warning sign that your marriage is over. While some people will contact a divorce lawyer at the first sign of cheating, others will tolerate one or two lapses of judgment. How you react to cheating will depend on you, but whether it’s once or ten times, it’s a sign that the relationship is not providing everything that both partners need and there are underlying issues that are causing this problem.

Lack of Physical Intimacy

It’s not just about sex, although that’s an important part of any healthy relationship. Physical intimacy is often just as much about holding hands, kissing, and cuddling as it is about the sexual side of things. If you’re not getting the physical contact that you need, then you’re going to start resenting your partner. The lack of that deep emotional connection can have a devastating effect on your self-esteem. Don’t wait to discuss your needs with your partner if they are not meeting them.

No Common Interests

People change over time, and the hobbies and activities that you once enjoyed together might fall by the wayside as life moves on. Having shared interests is good for any relationship, but especially for those that have committed to a marriage. If your interests have truly gone in different ways, then you’re going to be spending even less time together, and that can cause emotional turmoil and a feeling of abandonment. This is something you should address and recitfy as quickly as possible.

What Can You Do About It?

Not all marriages that have problems need to end in divorce. In fact, most problems can be recitified and resolved if both partners are willing to work on the issues. Once you have identified that the relationship is having problems, there are some obvious actions you can take:

• Couples Therapy: Sometimes it can take nothing more than a number of sessions with an experienced counselor in order to identify and work through the issues in your marriage. You should always seek therapy or counseling sessions first before throwing in the towel.

• Divorce: If the marriage is truly over because one partner is completely unwilling to work on the marriage or is abusive, then divorce might be your only option, especially if you are in a situation that feels unsafe for either you or your children. You could make sure that you pick a lawyer experienced with circumstances like yours. You might want to find an attorney experienced specifically in dealing with high value assets, for example.

• Annulment: If you’re not sure how to annul a marriage, it might actually be an easier process than you think. Although you will have to wait a set amount of time to get a divorce, you may be able to get an annulment much sooner. This can be a faster process but it can be difficult to fulfill the criteria, so check with a lawyer before you start moving forward.

Marriages always have their ups and downs. Spending long periods of time with another person will always mean that there are good times and bad times. Make sure that the bad times don’t outweigh the good. If they do, then it might be time to start looking into solutions before it’s too late.